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ISBN: 0-7570-0259-5
Length: 224 Pages
Size: 6 X
9-inch
Format: Quality Paperback
Category: Health / Eating Disorders
Price: $14.95
US
Availability:
In Print
Click below for:
Synopsis • Contents
Introduction • Reviews |
Synopsis
The diaries of most young women recount the
ups and downs of friendships, school, crushes, and first jobs. This
real-life journal does all that with a twist that can be a lifesaver.
Chronicling her life from ages fifteen to twenty-two, aspiring writer
Lisa Messinger captured on paper the evolution of her eating disorder,
from its development--before she even knew what it was--to its eventual
treatment. Interspersed throughout this fascinating story, eating
disorder expert Merle Cantor Goldberg provides insights into Lisa’s
struggle and ultimate victory.
Set against the backdrop of the "perfect" middle-class
family, Lisa’s story tells of her need to excel in school, her boyfriends,
her college life, and her budding career on the sets of America’s
most popular television shows. But Lisa also describes her growing
compulsion to record every calorie consumed, every measurement taken,
and every pound gained and lost, as her obsessive behavior took
control of her life.
While Lisa’s real-life journey offers a unique
view into the subtle and seductive nature of an eating disorder,
Ms. Goldberg’s invaluable additions help identify the causes and
signs of the problem as well as the paths available towards recovery.
My Thin Excuse can make that important difference
in the lives of all those who suffer from this dangerous disorder.
Lisa
Messenger received her degree in journalism from the University
of Southern California. Beginning as a health/nutrition/food reporter,
Lisa wrote for a number of prominent news groups, including the
Los Angeles Times Syndicate. Today, Lisa is a nationally syndicated
columnist and journalist whose columns are distributed through Copley
News Service to over 700 newspapers throughout North America. A
recipient of several national writing awards, Lisa is also the best-selling
author of seven health, nutrition, and food books. As a popular
speaker, Lisa lectures on eating disorders around the country and
has appeared on numerous television and radio programs.
Merle
Cantor Goldberg, LCSW received a diplomate in clinical social
work from the University of Maryland, and has specialized in treating
eating disorders for over thirty-five years. Over this period, she
has served as a training leader for the International Association
of Eating Disorders. Currently the Executive Director of Associates
in Psychotherapy, she has appeared on many radio and television
shows and is a highly sought-after lecturer. Ms. Goldberg’s articles
have been published in numerous newspapers and magazines, and she
is the co-author of Weight Loss Surgery and The Human
Circle.
Contents
Acknowledgments
Introduction: Problem, What Problem?
1. What’s Wrong With Me?
2. I’ll Diet ‘Til I Drop
Insights: How to Identify an Eating Disorder
3. Itsy-Bitsy-Teeny-Weeny Polka-Dot Bikini
4. Overwhelmed
Insights: Getting Thin Is Not the Answer
5. Limbo
6. White-Knuckling It
7. Momentary Hell
Insights: Why Self-Treatment Doesn’t Work
8. Weekly Therapy
9. Skipping Sessions
10. Promises, Promises
Insights: Seeking Help for Yourself or Someone You Care About
11. Love Affair
12. Real Life
Insights: Advice for the Rest of Your Life
Epilogue
Resource List
About the Authors
Index
Introduction
There always used to be a few candy wrappers under my bed. Not candy bar wrappers, but candy bag wrappers. I used to eat bags of candy, bags of cookies, bags of junk food, cartons of ice cream, dozens of doughnuts, and entire cakes. I wasn’t fat. I wasn’t hungry. I wasn’t even a food-lover. I had an eating disorder.
I was a bulimic, someone who binges and purges. Actually, in terms of my physical health, I was more fortunate than some bulimics. I didn’t vomit. Nevertheless, I fell within the ever-widening recognized spectrum of people with serious eating disorders, those with unreasonable, life-consuming concerns regarding body, weight, and eating. This huge and quickly growing group includes everyone from rail-thin anorectics to those plump from compulsive overeating. If you are holding this book, you or someone you love is probably a member of this very nonexclusive, yet extremely scary, and often life-threatening, club. My form of purging was not vomiting, but it was a “purge,” a way to “purify” myself. It was a way to rid myself not only of calories, but of the guilt I felt over eating. Like millions of others, I was caught in an addictive cycle of binging, followed by starvation dieting and compulsive exercise--not occasionally, but every day. Like all of us with any of the varied eating disorders along the spectrum, I was a slave to a scale and a twisted set of selfimposed rules.
It’s hard to remember those rules. I did, however, write most of them down in my diary. The front cover read “One Year Diary,” next to which I wrote, “You wanna make a bet!” That’s because I wrote sporadically in that diary for over seven years, from the ages of fifteen through twenty-two. It tells my story and I have a feeling it tells yours, too, or one like it. Because we who are entangled in self-destructive, energy-consuming cycles are far from alone.
This book came about because Francine Snyder, my psychologist who specialized in eating disorders, asked if she could include some of my writing in a project she was putting together. There was my diary, a few journals, a lot of assorted papers, and a couple of scrapbooks. A number of my writing instructors at the University of Southern California, where I was a journalism major, encouraged journal writing as class exercises. After seeing my entries, they also strongly suggested I have my diary published. As I read over my diary, journals, and papers, I realized that, without trying, I had caught on paper the obsession and compulsion of an eating disorder. I had written about it almost at its birth, before I even knew what it was, right through my recovery. I knew immediately my diary and journals, which intimately revealed everything about my life, including my rituals, secrets, and eventual therapeutic breakthroughs, could help others like you.
People living with an eating disorder are often secretive and find few outlets for their real feelings. Writing for me was partly this, but it was also more. I always wanted to be a writer. And I always wrote even when I didn’t know I wanted to be a writer. While I was in college, I had my first professional submission accepted by a national magazine. The editor of the magazine then asked me, a nineteen-year-old, to be a contributing reporter. I went on to get my degree in journalism, with a minor in women’s studies, and have gone on to be a nationally award-winning health, nutrition, and food journalist, syndicated columnist, and the author or coauthor of seven books.
I say this in order to provide some perspective on why I thought my diary might speak to you. I may have been suffering with the trauma of an eating disorder through the years this book covers; however, I was always a writer. The book that follows was never merely “Dear Diary.” Although I never expected anyone else to read it, I was always, for some reason, addressing my thoughts “Dear World.”
As it developed, however, this work blossomed into much more than a diary, and that is why I know it will be of even more help to you or your loved one. Through my work as a health, medical, and nutrition journalist, editor, and book author, I was fortunate to be recommended to work as editorial consultant for Merle Cantor Goldberg, LCSW, BCD, on another book. Merle is one of the country’s leading eating disorders psychotherapists and a longtime leader of the International Association of Eating Disorders Professionals Institute. I knew her cutting-edge, therapeutic perspective could analyze my diary and add possibly lifesaving advice for you.
Therefore, each time you read a few compelling, emotional chapters of the diary, you will then get helpful information (we call them Insights) from Merle. You will undoubtedly find highly relatable the diary’s What’s Wrong With Me? and I’ll Diet ’Til I Drop chapters, as I struggle with discovering and understanding my “strange eating habits” and start monitoring every morsel that goes into my mouth amidst the backdrop of being a “perfect” straight-A student, varsity tennis player, and award-winning public speaker. I was also a friend, girlfriend, sister, and daughter, but never told anyone close to me-- except my diary--about my struggle with food. Merle brings a brilliant focus on everything I write about early in the diary in her immensely helpful chapter, How to Identify an Eating Disorder, which includes the most comprehensive explanations of the entire spectrum of eating disorders that I have ever seen.
In Itsy-Bitsy-Teeny-Weeny Polka-Dot Bikini, I achieve the ultimate dream of all of us with eating disorders. Although I was never fat, except in my own mind, I finally starve and exercise myself into becoming exceptionally thin and what I --and the even more men with whom I am coming into contact, including tall blond models at my new coveted job on the sets of America’s top television shows--consider to be the “perfect” woman. A euphoria that you, too, at times may have experienced, sets in here. It all quickly falls apart, though, in Overwhelmed, where I almost break down trying to understand why that perfection and weight loss is not providing lasting happiness. Merle’s Getting Thin is Not the Answer tells us all why our ultimate goal of thinness, even when met, will just lead to additional problems if we don’t determine our underlying motivations.
In Limbo, White-Knuckling It, and Momentary Hell, I begin to eat meagerly again rather than completely starve myself, and desperately try to go it alone and tick off the seemingly interminable days one-by-one that I’ve been “good.” Even with that glamorous TV job and nights filled with exciting dates, I force myself to eat by impossibly strict rules in a frantic attempt to stay thin. If I had read Merle’s Insight section on page 000 Why Self-Treatment Doesn’t Work then, I would have understood that my solo attempts would always be futile. I would have saved myself a lot of pain and stress, and I am so grateful that you or someone you care about can reap the benefits of her wisdom.
I finally begin to see Francine Snyder, a psychologist specializing in eating disorders, as well as attend an eating disorders support group at the University of Southern California, and I capture in my diary the breakthroughs the moment I have them. In Weekly Therapy, Skipping Sessions, and Promises, Promises, I realize for the first time that this daily, self-destructive prison of a vicious cycle literally has nothing to do with food or weight. That amazed me and I am grateful to have caught this vital process on paper so that it can also trigger flashes of recognition from you. Merle’s Seeking Help for Yourself or Someone You Care About will take you far beyond those flashes to concrete, specific, lifealtering advice.
No one said it was going to be easy. Love Affair and Real Life catch the extreme highs, as well as occasional setbacks, that are part of living life on your own two feet without the harmful crutch of an eating disorder. In my case, that might have included a new sense of true self-confidence, dating and marrying a talented actor (who enters my life in the final diary chapter of this book), and working as a globe-trotting reporter. But it also meant dealing with what I finally realized were the often-extreme stresses of life--including the ups and downs of weight loss and weight gain--rather than numbing them with the compulsion of food binges followed by starvation and excessive exercise.
Merle’s Advice for the Rest of Your Life further explores all of that and adds invaluable guidance that will help ensure you or someone you love may never get caught again in the dangerous trap of an eating disorder. If you are concerned that you or someone you care about may have signs of an eating disorder, reading this book will provide valuable information and insight into the disease. Sometimes these signs can be subtle, sometimes not so subtle. The checklist, Recognizing an Eating Disorder, can help you identify the presence of a problem in yourself or a loved one. Start with the questionnaire. Then, continue reading to learn more about this life-threatening issue.
Reviews
to come
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